The Importance of Movement

Yesterday, we began the day with some yoga stretching and poses.  I began taking a yoga class through my local community education program about a year and a half ago, and I love it!  The instructors are great about teaching the poses and safety in the pose, and the hour is nice to take for myself.  In addition to the obvious health benefits, I love yoga for it's stress reduction benefits as well.  I (very) occasionally do yoga at home with my children- not because I don't want to, but because I just don't seem to get to it as often as we could.  :)

I recently was given the opportunity to take a class for work regarding obesity in children, and the role of nutrition and exercise for children.  While the class wasn't quite what I had been expecting prior to going in, it did give me some information to mull over.  The food and activity levels of children and families has been changing with every generation. I have only to look at my own family to be able to observe this first hand.  My parents are farmers, and while we had a television in the living room of our home, I was old enough to remember when we got one in another room, and was a teenager myself before I had my own television in my room.  We were outside, or reading, or building with blocks and cans, or just playing with our toys.  I look at my own children, and other children their ages that I know, and I see many with a TV in their rooms already at 3-5 years old.  I see all the phone and tablet apps out there, with preschoolers as the target audience.  I recently saw an ad to reduce your child's television time- by installing a storybook application on a tablet, to turn bedtime screen time into story time... while looking at a screen!  What happened to sitting down and reading a paper book with your child?  I understand and accept (and use) times when you need to get something done, and the TV is a convenient  distraction.  I get that. But when it is so overused, and used in place of actually spending time with your child, that makes me sad.

Also, while I was growing up, about half our food came from the farm.  We raised meat animals.  We had a garden- which the kids were expected to help weed and harvest, and help preserve.  We had dairy cows, followed by goats several years later. We didn't have to worry about a lot of the preservatives and chemicals that can be found in foods.  And we were all expected to do our part and pitch in.  We had chores in the barn as well as the house.  We didn't have to plan the exercise and activity opportunities that I do with my children- they were just there, ready built into our day.

The Center for Disease Control and Prevention and the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry both have multiple publications regarding the incidence of obesity in children.  It has become a serious problem, and one that it will take the efforts of everyone involved in the care of children to remedy.

There are some easy ways to begin... One is to do active play and exercise at home.   If you have trouble coming up with things to do with your children on your own, check out Pinterest- there are tons of suggestions available.  Pick up some fun, upbeat music and have a dance party.  Check out your local fitness centers and community education classes, and see what you can do- and then bring it home to do there as a family.  One of the best benefits of beginning my yoga practice is that I can bring it home to do with my children.  They get so excited to get out their mats for practice.

In short, just get out there!  It doesn't matter so much exactly what you do, as long as you are active and getting out there.  And if you are involved, it is so much more interesting for your children.... They want to be just like you!

Namaste

Go on... Get your hands dirty!

Being cooped up inside like we've been this winter due to the extreme cold is no fun for anyone.  Especially for little kiddos who are used to (and need to be) more active.  Kids tend to bottle up their energy if they aren't able to let it out, and for the sake of your house, you sometimes just can't let them run and jump all over the place.

But there is hope!  You can engage their senses in other ways, and sensory play is just the thing to do it.  Engaging your child's senses in meaningful play ideas can turn a stressful day of constant warnings to slow down and stop jumping onto the baby from the couch into a calm(er) day of learning.

Pinterest has TONS of great ideas for sensory play, and many of them are affordable and have multiple benefits for your child.  I keep a sensory table avaliable for my children at home, at all times.  It is nothing elaborate- just an under the bed storage bin that I picked up at Target and we set on a child height table (or the floor sometimes).

Some sensory items that I keep in our table at home for the kids are:

--Wacky Mac plus cups and chenille stems (aka, pipe cleaners). I love this pasta as a sensory tool.  There are several different pasta shapes, and they come in different colors in one bag. The kiddos love to scoop and pour the noodles, there are several that allow for being strung onto the chenille stems, they are great for sorting by type or color... The possibilities are only limited by my children's imagination.

--Rainbow rice plus cups and measuring spoons.  There are many ways to turn plain white rice into rainbow rice.  The one I used was to put the rice (about 2-3 cups) into a large Ziploc bag, and added about 1T of rubbing alcohol and several drops of food coloring.  I mushed the bag around  to spread the color, then poured the rice onto cookie sheets overnight to dry.  It turns out pretty light unless you use a lot of color, but when they are mixed together, it makes a really cool effect.  The kids love to scoop and pour, and this is a great medium to use with measuring spoons and cups, to see how teaspoons go into table spoons, and quarter cups into a whole cup.

--Cloud dough plus cups and small sandbox molds.  To make cloud dough, you mix flour and baby oil. It has an 8:1 ratio, so mixing 8 cups of flour with 1 cup of oil gives you the perfect consistency dough to mold and experience, and it is easy to halve or quarter if you don't need quite so much.  (TinkerLab has a great blog article about Cloud Dough!)  We loved molding and squishing the dough!

Beans plus cups and egg cartons.  We have TONS of dried beans, and they are a great medium for sensory play.  They are (usually) just big enough to be picked up with a pincer grip, which is super important for pre-writing skills, and are also great for sorting and counting.  We save egg cartons to put in with the beans, and write numbers in the bottom of the cups for counting.

I also love sensory bags and bottles for those times that a mess and/or small items in little hands are not appropriate.  Ate the Center, I have several empty plastic bottles that I have re-used to create visual sensory experiences for the infants in my care.  Baby oil plus ribbon and sequins in one.  Blue hair gel and enough water to make air bubbles in it when you shake it.  Aquarium rocks and water.  Fine sand and seashells plus water (the beach!).  We also have a couple taped-shut, gallon size Ziploc bags with hair gel and glitter that the babes can squish and mash (with supervision, of course!).  We have also pulled the seeds out of a pumpkin and put them in a bag with a little water for the babies to chase around with their fingers.

Sensory play is not limited to hands-in bins; it can also be scarves, texture books, felt boards, play mats, textured balls, and other cloth items that provide a different or interesting texture for little fingers to explore. It can be music and movement- feeling and learning how they can move their bodies and experience music.  It can be tasting and learning about new foods (at an appropriate age)- ie. fruits and vegetables that may not be as common (avacado or starfruit, anyone?)   Exposing children to new flavors can help set them up for life-long, healthy eating habits.  Children put toys in their mouths- because they can get a better feel for it by touching and tasting it than they could by just touching it alone.  

The point is, exploring with their senses is one of the best ways for little learners to experience... Learning!  Children who are encouraged to explore and learn in a safe environment become more adept at learning than their counterparts who are not afforded the opportunity to check out their world.  Learning is a skill, and children need to practice.  They need to learn that they are getting all kinds of information when they explore with sensory play.  Because, truly, it is not really play.  What we see as play is really the child's work.  The exploration, the learning that comes from utilizing their senses, the learning that they can learn from using their senses- this is all an essential building block to the future learning that children will do.

Rewind... Momma needs a do-over

From: Body Positive

I borrowed this picture from Body Positive on Facebook... It came across my timeline after being liked by a friend, and I really felt like this was what I work for every day.  Except for the 'try'. One of my sweet and beautiful sister's told me once that using 'try' gives you an out to not do what you are working toward.  "There is no try, there is either doing or not doing."  Such great advice, and since then, I've done my best to trade 'try' for 'working on' or 'doing my best'.  Our words have so much power, both to ourselves and others.  But that is a topic for another day...  :)

Yesterday was definitely one of 'those days'.  Everything that could frustrate me had to happen.  (OK, maybe not everything, but enough.)  It was a long day, and by the time I got home, I just wanted things to go smoothly and to not be so frustrated anymore.  But of course, that is the time that every little nit-picky thing happens.  Toys not picked up when the kiddos are directed to.  Making a mess with supper.  Not listening to story time.  And that ended up being where my stress got the best of me, and I yelled at my sweet baby doll.  *sigh.... Sad momma.  And sad, sweet girl.  

That was definitely the worst part of my day.  She was just too excited about her turn to read to be able to sit still and listen, and my frustration just poured out all over her.  After both of our tears were dried, we were able to work out a do-over, and got it much better.  Snuggles, songs, hugs and kisses.  Being forgiven, even though I won't forget what happened nearly as easily.

That said, I am forever grateful for the opportunities my children give me to be a better mom, a better person, every day.  They are some of my biggest reasons for changing that 'try' to 'working on'.  Children, in their simple understanding of how things are supposed to work, can give you the best reasons for improving.  It is a constant search to help figure things out, and sometimes there is no time to even think about where to look to become the kind of parent  you want to be.  But the effort is so worth it.

One of the best things that I have learned how to do is ask for another chance.  If I mess up, and I will, it is ok to ask for another chance to do it better.  Our second bedtime was so much better than the first, and for her made things so much better.  We have a little poem that the kids each say before they go to sleep, followed by one thing that made them happy that day that they say thank you for.  I was lucky enough to be her one thing that night, even after everything that we had been through. My sweet girl just melts my heart.

Hug your babies extra tight every chance you get.  Never miss an opportunity to tell them "I love you."  And always remember to ask for a rewind if it gets away from you.  That is what they will remember about the situation most... That you cared enough to do your best to make it better for both of you.

It's OK to Follow Through... Even Through Tears

What a crazy, busy week this feels like it has been!  We made it to the climb for Team Briley, and the fundraising was very successful for that.  What a wonderful feeling to be part of this effort, and a huge shout out to the climbers and fundraisers on that!  I have also been working on some class work that is a required part of my job, which has also energized me on several things to do and bring up in my classroom to improve learning and development for my kiddos there.   :)

I recently got to have a conversation about why I feel that it is ok to follow through on what you say you will or are going to with or for a child- even if they get upset about it.  The situation was that a caregiver needed both hands to accomplish a task, and told the child she was holding that he would need to be put down for a minute (and really, it would be less than that), and that she would scoop him right back up.  Before the child was set all the way down, he was clinging and fussing, and so was told that they would manage to complete the task while she was holding him.

Now, I don't enjoy a sad child any more than the next person does.  It is very hard to hear a child cry for you when they just want you to be holding and comforting them.  It can be difficult to maneuver around children at your feet when they are clinging to your legs or just sitting right behind you.  But it is sometimes necessary for the child to be put down to free both your hands for the job that you need to do.

When you are diapering, for instance, you must have both hands to properly attend to the child on the changing table.  When preparing a bottle or cereal, it is better to not have a child on your hip so that they can't knock an open bottle out of your hands, or cough or sneeze into a bottle that is not meant for them.  When a bottle or cereal is not meant for the sad child, it is sometimes better to leave them down so they don't grab or put their hands in someone else's food, or just disrupt the meal with a tantrum that they are not getting what they want.

Children learn early about cause and effect.  When you speak to your newborn, or stroke their cheek, and they turn their face in your direction.  When your infant shakes a rattle and hears the sound, so they try again.  When they kick the crib to make the mobile move.  When they cry, someone comes to get them, and figures out what they are asking for- and provides it.  Children are quick to catch on.

Unfortunately, there can be too much of a good thing.  The child whose cries are always responded to with a bottle never learn to soothe without one.  The child who is always held and provided with someone to entertain them never learns to play on their own, or to find a toy or activity without adult assistance.

Here is where that follow through comes in to play for an infant.  If you say that you need to put a child down for a few minutes, do it- even when they cry at you.  It is only for a moment, and there are times that it is for their own or another's health and safety.  And this can be just the beginning.  What you are teaching them far outweighs the sadness that they feel in the moment.  You are showing them  that you know that they can be ok for the moment without being held.  You are showing them that there are limits in their world.  You are teaching them that you will come back to them- and this may be one of the most important of all!  Children need to know that they are ok, and that you will return.  Starting with small moments allows you to work up to bigger times, where it may take you longer to be able to get back to them.

 When you tell a child no, or that they need to be put down for a set period of time, or that they will need to wait for their next bottle because other's are due first, but don't follow through, you are teaching your child that your no isn't important.  You are teaching them that with continued crying, you will change your answer... In short, your child is completely in charge.  The child that clings and cries so you don't put them down is going to have a harder time when you do put them down if you make a habit of holding them some of the time.  They learn that their crying/whining/clinging gets them what they want at the possible expense of health and safety.  And every time you give in, you are reinforcing the behavior that you don't want (cry/whine/cling).

It is the same concept for the older child who asks for a toy at the store.  If you say no, and they have a tantrum, or they beg and bargain, and you give in, you are reinforcing the negative behavior (begging/ tantrums).  Even if you say no some of the time and stick to it, it is harder for your child to accept it if you say no but change to yes even a fraction of the time.  What if this would be the time that you change your answer, if they just keep pecking away for another minute?  If they scream just a little louder?  If they beg just a little harder?  If you think you might say yes, simply don't say no.  Say that you will think about it.  Give them a goal to work on while you are at the store, something simple and clear.  If they meet your expectations, give them what they asked for. But there is a catch to that one too... If you give a specific direction for getting what they want, and they choose not to follow it, you have to keep your end of not getting them the toy.  Otherwise, you are back to square one of them learning that you don't mean what you say.

Now, why is this important?  The infant that doesn't learn that you will follow through on the directions that distress them, the toddler that doesn't learn to pick up their toys, the preschooler who learns that they can dictate their supper from the meal you planned to a PB-J...  These habits can build into a child who can (and likely will) defy you on the more important issues.  Don't play in the road.  Stay by me in parking lots and crowded stores. Doing homework.  Staying away from illegal and unsafe habits or choices.  Don't hurt other people.  I know it can sound silly to think that something like letting an infant dictate weather you hold them when it would really be safer for both of you if you set them down and let them fuss for 20 seconds could lead to worrying about future illegal choices, but learning starts at the beginning.  It's like the ripples on the pond on the movie Pocahontas...  Something can start out small, and get bigger and bigger, and you never know where it will end up.

On the flip side of this, do your best to reinforce the positives.  Notice when they are playing happily without your assistance, and comment on that in an upbeat tone of voice.  They may not understand your words, but they will understand your tone.  When they are able to wait (even somewhat) calmly or quietly for you to be able to pick them back up, tell them how well they did waiting, again in that upbeat tone.  Be sure to teach yourself to be specific in your praise, not just a general good job.  This lets the child hear what they did, so that they can start associating it with their (and your) actions.

In my personal experience as a caregiver, as an educator, as a parent, it is so important for children to have clear limits and directions, and clear consequences for making choices counter to those directions.  It is important for us to teach children that their are limits, and that sometimes the answer is "no" or "not now" or "you will need to wait a bit."  It doesn't do children any favors to always hear yes.  It only makes it more difficult when they encounter someone who can't say yes as well.

I am NOT a Baby Sitter

I'm really not.  I do not sit on the babies.  Ever.  I will do what is needed to use a nasal aspirator or get prescription eye drops in on occasion, but still not sitting on the babies.  The higher ups in the child care industry make frowny faces when that happens.

I have been caring for children for most of my life, and I have to admit that the only children I ever sat on were my brothers, when I was a child myself.  And since my momma only ever said to take it outside...  Fair was fair.  :)

I was a baby sitter (no sitting on the babies, though) through most of my teenage years.  There were two families whose children I watched most frequently, and it cemented knowing what I wanted to do and where I wanted to be with my life.  I got my start teaching my second brother how to write the word 'horse' before he even knew what the letters were, or could spell his own name.  I think he was three, and I would have been about 11.  But he was so proud that he could write horse by himself, and know what it said.  It was a great feeling for me as well, to see him learn and know that I had helped him gain this skill.  Now, through the power of Facebook, I can still see the accomplishments of those other children, and it is an awesome feeling to think that I may have had some part in helping them become the young people they are today.  (Although it does make me a little sad to still think of them as the little munchkins they were, and know that they are actually 13-19 now.)

I have been a professional child care provider for about 10 of the last 13 years.  I got a work study job on campus while I was in college, working at the on-campus child care.  It was a great first experience, and I learned a lot about professionalism and helping children learn there.  I was at another center a few years later, and it was a culture shock for me.  Not in a bad way, just in that the campus child care had resources this one didn't.  It was still a great experience for me.  Now, I have been with my current center for 7 years (just had my anniversary yesterday!), and specifically an infant teacher for over 6 years of that.  I love it.  For me, I have the best job, wonderful children, great co-workers, and terrific bosses. Yes, there are days that are more difficult than others, but I can never see myself being anywhere but where I am.

As part of my job, I am required to continue my education in child development and teaching.  This would be one of the biggest differences in babysitters and professional care givers.  Both can care for your child, and do a great job.  But a professional has that training and education to back them up.  One of my biggest concerns when beginning in child care was that I was younger than so many of the parents that were clients of the center where I worked.  Why would these parents feel that I was worth listening to, when, at the time, most of them were several years older, and had several children?  Because I had my education and professors to back me up.  I could cite information that I'd learned if a parent came to me with a concern.  I could mention to my director a concern that I had about a child, and state why I thought there was something to be worried about.  Being able to have that education and training made (and still makes) all the difference.  Being able to keep up with the latest research and theories on child development allow me to catch potential problems much earlier than someone who just doesn't have that option available to them.

Another part of this educational difference is being able to be a 'specialist' in your area.  For me, this means focusing on infants, infant care, and infant development.  For another, it might mean toddlers or preschoolers.  For still others, it might mean being able to know all three, and how to integrate them into a (mostly) harmonious care setting.

To me, and others I am sure, another big difference is knowing the professionalism that needs to go into being a professional care giver.  It's in how you dress, how you communicate, how you respond and react to any given situation, how you handle personal or confidential information.  There are rules and policies in place that make it less confusing for us as professionals, but it's still A LOT to remember and keep straight.

Part of being a professional care giver is also making yourself into a resource for children and families.  You have to know when to offer your knowledge, and when to wait for them to ask.  You have to know, have a general idea, or know who to ask about the programs and community resources available in your area.  Being part of a child's village is an awesome thing, and being able to help parents know who else they can turn to in their child's time of need is an important tool for the family.

So, when you are looking for child care, go in with a list of what you want to know about us.  We want you to ask questions and make sure that we are the best fit for your child and your family.  We come to care very much for you and your child; professional child care is definitely not for everyone.  But to those of us who are called to it, it is definitely a labor of love.